Sure, it might be too early, usually, to think about Christmas but I have a few very good reasons to start this early:

• I like my friends, and we all like handmade goodies. Thus, I wanted to knit them all something.
• I am a very slow knitter. I prefer small projects, but even small projects get procrastinated on.
• I have plenty of time on my hands.

I love handmade. If I could, I’d buy all my presents on Etsy. Well, I’d buy everything on Etsy. As I try to tell E, I don’t want to keep anything around soley because it looks pretty unless it was handcrafted with detail. So, no Hummels for me¹, but a handmade toy? I’m all over that.

To that end, I have plenty of free time and not so much money. And as it turns out, most of what I want to knit my friends will run me two to three balls of yarn, which in turn comes out to $4.00–6.00 each. A unique Christmas present for $6.00 and a few hours of my time? Color me happy.

As you can see, I’ve already started. The Eggplant (or, Auburgine, as the book calls it) was the easiest of the patterns that I’m crafting, and is for a friend who wouldn’t suspect that I’m sending her anything, so it’s safe to show off. Safe too is the in-progress, as you can’t really tell what it is, other than it looks complicated.

And it is. It’s my first real introduction into stranded knitting, and is why that piece isn’t done yet. If it was all one color, it’d have been done in an hour.

I’ll try to keep track of everything I’ve knit, and hope to do a blog post for each one, mostly to talk about why I chose that particular pattern for that friend, since there is a rhyme for each reason.

But it’s nice to actually complete something. I was so thrilled as the eggplant came together. E was super impressed, and I was happy with how my first attempt at knitting a toy came out. It also made me in awe of the woman who came up with these patterns, as even though it wasn’t complicated to knit, I can’t imagine what it took to originally come up with the form and pattern.

(p.s. if you think you’re getting a softy from me, good luck trying to figure it out. besides, i made sure none of the colors rendered correctly so you could figure out just what exactly I’m knitting.)

1. My sister has already claimed them when the time comes to divvy up my mom’s stuff. However, I think it’s cheating for her to buy my mom Hummels when she knows she’s going to end up with them

Actually, I like legal arguments of any kind. Say, for example, a legal fight between Debbi Stoller and Sew Fast Sew Easy over the phrase “stitch and bitch” (updates over at Girl From Auntie). My love for legal documents and arguments cause me to waste time at work, because if I catch a choice phrase on a deposition transcript while I’m copying it, I have to stop and read a few pages.

This sick, strange love manifested pretty early, and it’s one of the main reasons why I wanted to become a lawyer in high school. Now I’d be happy as a paralegal, I think, or a researcher. I love looking things up. Writing about them? Not so much.

So, when I come across legal arguments being played out on the internet, I take notice. I take interest (I take a sad look at myself when I realize I’ve just badly quoted a Dashboard Confessional song). I try to keep up on the proceedings. I read legal documents when released.

And really, I just find another way to waste my time.

Like, today, for example. I have an English final today, and I can bring a page of notes with me. Did I do a page? No. Did I do anything? No. Why? Because I procrastinate so badly. And legal arguments are the best way to do it.

—”Several Ways to Die Trying,” A Mark, A Mission, A Brand, A Scar: Dashboard Confessional